I cannot love you. I want to.

Free Verse — It’s Complicated: Lit Up & The Writing Cooperative Contest

Cocooned in the safety of the crisp beige sheets,
we were entwined
like lovers aching for more than a taste
of the other.
Like lovers, we were.
Lovers, we were far from.
Crimson stains from the wine we’d recklessly shared the night before -
warning signs, stop signs, emergency brakes…
They had nothing on us. The signs,
we ignored on purpose. The stains,
evidence of the mess we’d created, made worse and swept aside.
Waking up with no memory of the previous few hours
but with the stir of passion still coursing through our veins,
Bursting out, plain as an asteroid shooting across a vacant ebony sky -
broad upturned lips, just a few seconds before, interlocked.
Padlocked hearts slowly unlatched by greasy tactics and well-oiled strategies,
Weak metal bent and broken, there go our defences
over white picket fences — our flawless facades
that masked the ruins within,
the longing, yearning for people we could never have -
each other,
we realised too late how right we were,
how we completed each others’ broken stories.
Realised it after the bells sang out,
after we were both bound by unbreakable vows,
unable to harmlessly love the other.

embracing for the last time, getting ready to part because
I cannot love you
even though I want to.
I really want to.

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